Why I Believe I Can Be Jewish and Gay

It’s difficult to turn on any news program without finding some discussion on homosexuality and religion.  President Barack Obama has confirmed his support of Gay Marriage; giving hope to millions they may finally have equal rights under the law.   The Gay Marriage debate seems to have turned everyone into a Biblical scholar that can only quote a couple admonishments of homosexuality in Scripture and that is enough to prove their point.  Before that every network had some dramatic telling of Dan Savage’s attack on religion.  With these new hot topics being on the top of everyone’s mind, I’ve been asked several times how I can reconcile my Judaism with my homosexuality.

My answer is simple: Most people don’t know how to read the Torah or Bible.  I’m sure I’ve just angered 99% of the people who will read this; but it’s true.  Most people, me included, are cherry pickers when reading the Good Book.  By picking out the single line from the center of a paragraph one can invent any interpretation they chose, usually out of context.  Religious leaders have been doing this for centuries and their misinterpretations have become dogma.  A wise rabbi once told me to read my TaNaKH (Jewish Bible) with the same enthusiasm I had when I read the Harry Potter series and when I did, it was like reading a completely new book.

Leviticus 18 is usually the first example given of G-d’s abhorrence to homosexuality.  Sure, line 22 would seem to be such an admonishment if you choose to read only that line.  The chapter actually starts with a rewording of the First Utterance (First and Second Commandments), reaffirming who our G-d is.  We’re also advised not to fall into the practices of the Egyptians and Canaanites.  We’re provided with a long list of women we shouldn’t have sex with for one reason or another; most of which should have been common sense.  Now that there’s all this sex on our minds, here’s an edict not sacrifice our babies to Molek (a local deity). Okay back to sex, we can’t do it with other guys or animals.  Once again, we’re told don’t do as they did and, just in case you missed it, here’s another reminder of who our G-d is. The parsha may appear to be about sexual purity on the surface, but I read it differently.

In my Comprehensive Writing course during high school, one of the things taught was basic writing structure.  First is the opening: Tell them what you’re going to tell them.  This is followed by a few lines or paragraphs of body: Tell them what you want to tell them. Finally comes the conclusion: Tell them what you told them.  It is not difficult to see that Leviticus 18 is written in the same structure and the main intent is clearly regarding idolatry, not sexual piety.  “I’m G-d. Don’t worship me the way they do their gods. Which means don’t do these things as sacred acts and sacrifices because as your G-d I don’t like it.”  If adultery were the issue, I am sure G-d would have used the Seventh Commandment to open and close the chapter.  Recently, a Born-Again Christian produced Romans 1:18-32 as proof of G-d’s hatred of gays, which steeled my opinion when I found it written in the same basic format showing the topic to be idolatry.

The next example frequently given is Sodom and Gomorrah in the story of Lot.  Here we have a guy living in a tent outside of town who gets a visit from three angels.  Every single male resident of the town want to “know” the three guests; obviously there would be rape involved. Lot refuses and offers his two virgin daughters, but all the men refuse take the virgins since the angels are their target.  I find it very unlikely that both towns were filled with nothing but gay men.  I think their main sin was, again, idolatry.  Archeology has shown us the gods worshipped throughout the Middle East in Biblical times required various sex and blood sacrifices and I believe the Sodomites were out to do just that.

Probably the most controversial love story in the Bible is the story of David and Jonathan.  You cannot read their story in the books of Samuel without seeing several examples of how strong their love was.  .  As the story progresses we find that David and Jonathan’s souls were “knit with one another”, an obvious reference to soul mates.  The two men are constant companions even after David starts marrying every woman who can improve his status which eventually helped make him king; history shows marriage was a tool to promote treaties, grow wealth and gain lands that would increase the size of a kingdom.  This love story is tragically ended when Jonathan is killed by the Philistines, to which David lamented,  “Your love was wonderful to me, more than the love of women.”   Scholars usually refer to this story as the first bromance; however, each year more are showing there is a certain level of intimacy to the story that suggest it was romantic in nature.  If David and Jonathan were lovers, G-d obviously did not disapprove since He loved David in all things; except when he committed adultery and murder by proxy so he could take Bathsheba as a wife.

Every religion teaches that nothing can exist in nature unless G-d allows it to be.  One would be surprised to know that homosexuality has been observed in over 1,500 different species on the Earth, from the most complex to extremely basic.  Five hundred of these species have had their homosexual tendencies well documented.    If G-d felt homosexuality was a grievous trait for any living being to possess, He would have eliminated it before the first creature ever showed signs. 

It took me many years to realize that I can be a man of faith and gay at the same time, they weren’t mutually exclusive.  There were many years that I called myself an atheist, Wiccan, or spiritualist, but I knew there was something missing.  It took a great man to show me that my sexuality had little influence on what religions were open to me.  I admit, for me it wasn’t an easy path but it was well worth traveling.  Because in the end I realized that G-d would love me as long as I continue to work on being the best person possible, even a gay one.